Chicago: The Windy City... and the Waiting City for a Total Eclipse
Let's talk about something that’s about as exciting as watching paint dry (but with way cooler consequences): solar eclipses in Chicago.
If you’re imagining the city plunged into darkness, accompanied by a chorus of howling coyotes and panicked pigeons, I’m sorry to burst your bubble. While Chicago has had its fair share of dramatic weather events (hello, polar vortex!), a total solar eclipse hasn’t been one of them.
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| Has There Ever Been A Total Eclipse In Chicago |
So, What's the Deal?
Chicagoans, we’ve been dealt a cosmically crappy hand. While other cities get to experience the thrill of day turning into night in a matter of minutes, we’re stuck with a front-row seat to, well, not much. We get partial eclipses, which is like getting a half-eaten pizza. Sure, it’s food, but where’s the rest of it?
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But don’t despair, eclipse enthusiasts! There’s a glimmer of hope. According to NASA, the next total solar eclipse visible from Chicago will be on September 14, 2099. So, if you’re planning a really, really long-term stay in the Windy City, you might just get lucky.
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What About the Past?
Let's take a quick trip down memory lane. The last time Chicago experienced anything close to a total eclipse was in 1994. It was more like a "94% eclipse," which is basically nature's way of saying, "Almost there, Chicago. Almost there."
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So, while we might not be the eclipse capital of the world, we can still appreciate the celestial show from afar. Plus, it gives us something to look forward to, right? Maybe by 2099, they'll have perfected teleportation, and we can all beam ourselves to the path of totality.
How to Prepare for a (Hypothetical) Chicago Total Eclipse
- How to manage unrealistic expectations: Lower them. Way down.
- How to plan a 75-year-long party: Start saving now.
- How to become a professional eclipse watcher: Move to somewhere with more frequent eclipses.
- How to cope with FOMO: Embrace the partial eclipse experience.
- How to time travel: Figure that one out, and let us know.
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