When Solomon Met the Gray Lady: A Tale of Pitch and Peril
Deborah Solomon, the woman who once claimed to have found homoeroticism in Norman Rockwell's paintings (a claim that was about as subtle as a brick to the face), decided to pitch an article to The New York Times Magazine. You know, the same publication that prides itself on being the intellectual arbiter of our times. It was like a moth flying into a flamethrower.
The Pitch: A Bold Stroke or a Hail Mary?
Solomon's pitch, we're told, was a doozy. It was a blend of psychoanalysis, cultural commentary, and a dash of "I-know-better-than-you" attitude. Imagine a caffeinated squirrel on a sugar rush, trying to write a serious piece about the meaning of life. That's basically what we're dealing with here.
The Times, being the bastion of journalistic integrity that it is, must have had a collective facepalm moment. Can you imagine the editorial meeting? "So, this woman wants to write about [insert wild theory here]... and she thinks we'll bite?"
The Response: A Diplomatic Dance
Now, we can only speculate about what actually happened behind closed doors. Did they laugh, cry, or simply stare in bewildered silence? We'll never know for sure. But what we do know is that the Times, with the grace of a seasoned diplomat, managed to decline the pitch without outright insulting Solomon's intelligence.
It's like that friend who tells you their terrible singing voice is actually a hidden talent. You smile, nod, and slowly back away. The Times did the equivalent of a slow, dignified backpedal.
The Aftermath: A Lesson for All
This whole debacle serves as a valuable lesson for us all. First, just because you have something to say, doesn't mean anyone wants to hear it. Second, even the most prestigious publications have their limits. And third, sometimes it's best to just stick to writing about things you actually know something about.
In conclusion, Solomon's pitch to the New York Times Magazine was a bold move, to say the least. It's a story that reminds us that even the most unexpected things can happen in the world of publishing. And while it may not have ended in a byline, it certainly gave us all a good laugh.
How To...
How to pitch an article that won't get rejected immediately: Do your research, know your audience, and for the love of all that is holy, proofread.
How to deal with rejection: Cry, eat ice cream, then pick yourself up and try again. Or, you know, just move on.
How to write a compelling article: Have something interesting to say and say it clearly. Oh, and avoid wild, unsubstantiated theories.
How to become a successful writer: Write consistently, build a platform, and never give up. Or, you know, win the lottery.
How to survive in the publishing industry: Develop a thick skin, a strong sense of humor, and a bottomless supply of caffeine.
