Houston: The Concrete Jungle Where It Never Rains (Apparently)
Houston, Texas – the city where dreams are made of... and where it hasn't rained in about a million years. At least, that's what it feels like. We're starting to think that the weather forecasters are secretly in cahoots with the cacti.
Is Houston Turning Into a Desert?
We’re not exaggerating when we say it feels like we're living in a desert. Our skin is drier than a popcorn kernel left out overnight, and our plants are looking at us with those pleading, "water me, please" eyes. It's like Houston has decided to become the next Dubai, but without the fancy skyscrapers and oil money. Just the scorching heat and the constant search for moisture.
The Great Houston Drought of 2023 (and Beyond)
It's official: we're in the midst of a historic drought. We've seen more tumbleweeds than actual rain clouds. Our reservoirs are shrinking faster than our bank accounts after a shopping spree. And don't even get us started on the wildfires. It's like Mother Nature is trying to give us a hint, but we're too busy blasting the AC to notice.
How to Survive the Houston Heatwave
- Embrace Your Inner Lizard: Learn to bask in the sun like a pro. Bonus points if you can develop the ability to change color based on the temperature.
- Invest in a Humidifier: This is basically a life-saving device at this point. Your skin will thank you.
- Start a Cactus Garden: If you can keep a cactus alive in this heat, you deserve a medal.
- Move to the Coast (Just Kidding): We love Houston, but sometimes the heat is just too much.
How to...
- How to conserve water: Take shorter showers, fix leaky faucets, and consider installing a rain barrel (if it ever rains again).
- How to protect your skin: Wear sunscreen, cover up, and stay hydrated.
- How to keep your cool: Use fans, wear light clothing, and avoid outdoor activities during peak heat hours.
- How to entertain yourself indoors: Get creative with hobbies, binge-watch shows, and play board games.
- How to find humor in the situation: Laugh it off, share memes, and remember that this too shall pass (hopefully).
