Chicago Bears: The Windy City Wonders (Or Not)
So, you wanna know how many games the Chicago Bears won this year, huh? Well, buckle up, buttercup, because this is gonna be a rollercoaster of a ride. Or, you know, more like a slow, painful descent into the depths of mediocrity.
A Brief History of Not-So-Greatness
Let's be honest, the Bears haven't exactly been setting the NFL ablaze with their stellar performances. It's like they're trying to win the award for "Most Disappointing Team" every year. And they're consistently in the running.
But hey, there's always next year, right? Or the year after that. Or maybe the one after that. You get the picture.
The 2023 Season: A Tale of Woe (Mostly)
Now, let's talk about the real juicy stuff: the 2023 season. If you're a Bears fan, you probably want to skip this part and go watch some cat videos instead. But if you enjoy a good underdog story (or anti-story, in this case), read on.
The Bears managed to scrape together a whopping 7 wins in the entire season. Seven. That's like, barely passing math class. Some might argue that's a statistical anomaly, but let's be real, it's just plain bad.
How to Become a Bears Fan (Masochism Optional)
If you're still reading at this point, you either have an ironclad commitment to suffering or you're just really bored. Either way, here are some tips for becoming a Bears fan:
- Develop a thick skin: You're gonna need it.
- Learn to love disappointment: It's a core Bears fan skill.
- Master the art of hope: Because there's always that tiny chance things will get better.
How to survive a Bears game: Stock up on alcohol and comfort food.How to explain to your friends why you're a Bears fan: Therapy.How to find other Bears fans: Support groups.How to stay positive about the Bears: Denial.How to find a hobby that doesn't involve heartbreak: Literally anything else.