Ambulance Rides: A Pricey Trip to the Hospital
So, you're feeling a bit under the weather. Maybe you've slipped on a banana peel (classic), or perhaps you've simply decided that living life on the edge as a human pi�ata is your new hobby. Whatever the case, you've come to the brilliant conclusion that an ambulance ride is the perfect way to spend your afternoon. Well, let's talk about that.
How Much Does It Cost To Call An Ambulance In Chicago |
Buckle Up, It's Going to Cost Ya
Now, ambulances are like those fancy, leather-seated taxis, except they're way more stressful and come with the added bonus of sirens and flashing lights. And just like those fancy taxis, they don't come cheap. In fact, calling an ambulance in Chicago is like buying a small island in the Caribbean – minus the palm trees and the rum.
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Basic Life Support (BLS): This is like getting a ride in a regular car. You'll get the basics – transportation to the hospital. But don't expect any fancy medical procedures. This will still set you back a cool $2,946.
Tip: Rest your eyes, then continue.
Advanced Life Support (ALS): Now, this is where things get interesting. Think of it as upgrading to a limo. You'll get all the bells and whistles – paramedics, fancy equipment, and the works. But the price tag? A whopping $3,227.
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And that's not all! There's also a mileage fee of $19 per mile. So, if you live in the suburbs and decide to have a medical emergency downtown, you might as well start saving up now.
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Why So Expensive?
You might be wondering, "Why on earth is it so expensive to get picked up by a glorified glorified taxi?" Well, let's just say that providing emergency medical care isn't exactly cheap. Ambulances are equipped with life-saving equipment, and the paramedics are highly trained professionals. Plus, they have to deal with all sorts of crazy situations, from heart attacks to people who've accidentally glued their hand to their face. It's a tough job, and it comes with a hefty price tag.
How to Avoid an Ambulance Bill (Probably Not)
Okay, so you're probably thinking, "How can I avoid this astronomical cost?" Well, the most obvious answer is to not get sick or injured. But let's be real, that's easier said than done. Here are a few other options:
- Become a superhero: Develop superhuman abilities to heal yourself instantly.
- Learn to teleport: Avoid the need for transportation altogether.
- Win the lottery: Pay for the ambulance ride with your winnings.
Just kidding! Unfortunately, there's no guaranteed way to avoid an ambulance bill. But if you do find yourself in need of one, make sure you have good health insurance.
How To... Ambulance Edition
- How to avoid an ambulance ride: Stay healthy, wear a helmet, and maybe invest in a really good pair of shoes.
- How to prepare for an ambulance ride: Have your insurance information handy and try to stay calm.
- How to pay an ambulance bill: Check with your insurance provider and explore payment plans if necessary.
- How to find the cheapest ambulance service: Unfortunately, there's no such thing as a cheap ambulance service.
- How to become a paramedic: If you're looking for a challenging and rewarding career, consider becoming a paramedic.
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