Rao's: The Holy Grail of Reservations
So, you want to eat at Rao's, huh? Well, buckle up, buttercup, because you're about to embark on a quest more challenging than finding a unicorn with a unicycle. This isn't just about securing a table; it's about joining a secret society.
The Legend of Rao's
Rao's. Two syllables that inspire equal parts drool and despair. It's the culinary equivalent of winning the lottery, except instead of numbers, you need connections, charm, or maybe just a really good Italian grandma.
The Black Market of Reservations
Let's be real: Getting a reservation at Rao's is like trying to buy concert tickets for a band that hasn't existed for 50 years. People trade favors, pull strings, and even resort to questionable tactics. Some say there's an underground Rao's reservation black market, where tables change hands for more than just a pretty penny.
Your Chances: Slim to None
Unless you're a long-lost relative of the owner or have a personal connection to a mobster (kidding... kind of), your chances of getting a table are about as good as winning the Nobel Prize for eating pasta. But hey, don't let that discourage you! Dreaming is free, and who knows, maybe your lucky stars will align.
How to Increase Your Odds (Slightly)
- Know Someone, Anyone: This is the golden ticket. If you have even a distant acquaintance who's managed to snag a table, leverage that connection.
- Be Prepared to Wait: If you manage to get a reservation, be prepared to wait. And by wait, I mean potentially hours. But hey, it's Rao's, so it's probably worth it.
- Embrace the Rejection: Getting rejected by Rao's is almost a rite of passage. Don't take it personally. There are plenty of other great Italian restaurants in NYC.
- Become a Regular Somewhere Else: Build a rapport with a different Italian restaurant. You never know, they might hook you up with a Rao's reservation as a reward for your loyalty.
- Learn Italian: Maybe if they think you're family, they'll let you in. Just a thought.
How To... Rao's Edition
- How to increase your chances of getting a reservation at Rao's? Know someone, anyone.
- How to prepare for a potential wait at Rao's? Bring a good book, your patience, and a sense of humor.
- How to deal with rejection from Rao's? Find another amazing Italian restaurant.
- How to impress your friends if you do manage to get a table at Rao's? Act cool and casually mention you've been going there since you were in diapers.
- How to survive the Rao's experience? Enjoy the food, the atmosphere, and the fact that you somehow pulled it off.