How to Become a Waiter in the Concrete Jungle: A Survival Guide
So, you want to be a waiter in New York City? Brave soul. You’re probably imagining yourself gliding effortlessly between tables, juggling plates like a pro, and making bank in tips. Well, buckle up, buttercup, because reality might be a little different.
Step 1: Develop a Thick Skin (and a Love for People)
Let's be real, dealing with people is like herding cats, but with less fur and more attitude. You'll encounter everything from the overly friendly to the downright demanding. Your ability to smile through gritted teeth will be your superpower. Also, remember, not everyone is a jerk. Some people are genuinely nice and will tip well. It’s a numbers game, really.
Step 2: Master the Art of Multitasking (and Juggling)
You’ll be running around like a chicken with its head cut off, trying to remember who ordered the well-done steak, who wants their coffee black, and who just spilled red wine on their white shirt. It's like playing Tetris, but with food and drinks. Don't worry if you accidentally bring someone else's order; it happens to the best of us. Just blame it on the heat or something.
Step 3: Learn to Speak Fluent Menu (and Fake Enthusiasm)
You’ll need to know the menu inside and out, from the artisanal bread to the wagyu beef. And you'll have to feign excitement about every single dish, even if it's just grilled chicken. Remember, you’re selling a dream, not just food.
Step 4: Develop a Strong Back (and Legs)
You'll be carrying trays that could rival the weight of a small child. And let's not forget about those endless flights of stairs in some restaurants. You'll be getting a workout like no other.
Step 5: Embrace the Hustle (and the Low Pay)
The waiter life is all about hustle. You'll be working long hours, dealing with rude customers, and probably making less than minimum wage if you don’t factor in tips. But hey, at least you’ll have great stories to tell.
Remember: Patience is key. It might take a while to find the perfect restaurant fit. Don’t get discouraged. Keep your chin up and your serving tray level. And most importantly, tip your servers!
How to...
- How to get your foot in the door? Network, network, network! Talk to people in the industry.
- How to handle rude customers? Kill them with kindness (or at least pretend to).
- How to make more money? Learn the art of upselling and provide exceptional service.
- How to survive the long shifts? Stay hydrated, eat well, and take short breaks when possible.
- How to deal with the stress? Find a hobby to de-stress, like yoga or meditation.