Is There a Buc-ee's in New York? The Great Northeast Buc-ee's Drought
Alright, let’s talk about something important: the complete and utter lack of Buc-ee’s in New York. I mean, seriously, what is this world coming to?
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| Is There A Buc Ee's In New York |
New York: The Buc-ee’s Black Hole
Now, I know what you’re thinking. "New York? Buc-ee’s? That’s like asking if there’s a blizzard in the Sahara." And you’d be right. But hear me out. For those of you who live under a rock (or maybe just haven’t been to Texas), Buc-ee’s is basically convenience store nirvana. It’s got gas, snacks, clean bathrooms (a miracle in itself), and enough jerky to feed a small army.
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But New York? Nada. Zilch. Zero. Not a single one. It’s like the state has collectively decided to deprive its citizens of the simple joy of grabbing a beaver nugget and a refreshing drink while stretching their legs on a road trip.
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The Conspiracy Theories
Some people think it’s a deliberate plot to keep New Yorkers from experiencing true happiness. Others believe it’s because the state is too small to accommodate a Buc-ee’s. (Clearly, these people have never been to a Buc-ee’s.) And then there are those who insist that New Yorkers are too sophisticated for such a thing. To those people, I say: have you ever been to a Buc-ee’s?
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The Call to Action
So, what can we do about this tragic situation? Well, we could start by writing angry letters to our representatives. Or we could organize a Buc-ee’s flash mob in Times Square. Or, we could just accept our fate and resign ourselves to a life without beaver nuggets.
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But seriously, New York, we deserve better. Let’s make some noise and demand a Buc-ee’s!
How to... Buc-ee’s Edition
- How to survive a road trip without Buc-ee’s: Stock up on snacks, find rest stops with decent bathrooms, and pray for short drives.
- How to explain Buc-ee’s to a non-believer: Show them pictures, tell them stories, and maybe bring them some jerky as a peace offering.
- How to dream about a world with Buc-ee’s everywhere: Close your eyes, imagine the smell of barbecue, and let your mind wander.
- How to cope with Buc-ee’s withdrawal: Find a local convenience store that’s halfway decent, and pretend it’s a mini-Buc-ee’s.
- How to support the cause for a New York Buc-ee’s: Spread the word, share your Buc-ee’s love on social media, and maybe start a petition.
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