The Chicago Cubs: More Valuable Than Your Entire Life Savings (Probably)
So, you're wondering how much the Chicago Cubs are worth, huh? Well, buckle up, buttercup, because we're about to dive into the world of billion-dollar baseball.
The Cubbies: A Pricey Bunch
Let's get down to brass tacks. The Chicago Cubs are worth a whopping $4.2 billion as of 2024. That's right, with a "B." For those of us who struggle to count past our weekly grocery bill, this number is about as mind-boggling as a curveball from Shohei Ohtani. To put it in perspective, that's enough money to buy a small country, fund a moon colony, or hire every single person on Earth to sing "Go Cubs Go" for a year straight.
Why So Much Dough?
You might be wondering, "What makes these guys so darn expensive?" Well, it's a combination of factors. First off, there's the Wrigley Field factor. That historic ballpark is a goldmine in itself. It's like owning a beachfront property in the middle of Chicago. Then, there's the fan base. Cubs fans are as loyal as they come. They'd probably mortgage their houses to buy a ticket to a game. Finally, let's not forget the winning factor. The Cubs ended their infamous curse in 2016, and that World Series win sent their value skyrocketing.
You Could Buy a Small Island...
Just for fun, let's do some hypothetical math. If you somehow managed to win the lottery and wanted to buy the Cubs, you'd need a pretty hefty jackpot. We're talking Powerball-level winnings here. With that kind of cash, you could also buy a small island, a fleet of private jets, and enough avocado toast to last a lifetime. But hey, who needs all that when you can own a baseball team?
How to Become a Cubs Owner (Probably Not)
Okay, so you're dreaming of owning the Cubs. Let's be realistic: you probably won't. But if you were to try, here are a few tips:
- How to win the lottery: This is the most obvious (and least likely) option.
- How to become a billionaire: Building a successful business is always an option.
- How to marry into money: Love is a gamble, but it could pay off.
- How to discover a lost treasure: Pirates of the Caribbean, anyone?
- How to invent time travel: Go back and bet on the right horse.
So there you have it. The Chicago Cubs are a pricey bunch, but they're also a beloved part of American sports history. And while owning them might be out of reach for most of us, we can still enjoy the game and dream big.