What Happens If the Houston Texans Lose? A Dramatic Breakdown
Let's face it, Texans fans, we've all been there. Heart pounding, nails bitten to the quick, and a general sense of impending doom. But what exactly does a Texans loss mean? Let's dive into the depths of despair, I mean, explore the potential outcomes.
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| What Happens If The Houston Texans Lose |
The World Will Not End (Probably)
It's tempting to think that a Texans loss is the equivalent of a global catastrophe, but let's be real. The sun will still rise, the birds will still sing (or at least chirp), and your favorite taco place will still be open. The world is a big place, and while a Texans loss might feel like the end of it, it's really not.
Tip: Take a sip of water, then continue fresh.
The City of Houston Will Not Sink
Contrary to popular belief, the Houston Texans are not holding up the city with their sheer willpower. If they lose, the city won't suddenly be swallowed by the Gulf of Mexico. Buildings will still stand, traffic will still be terrible, and people will still complain about the heat.
Tip: Read once for gist, twice for details.
Texans Fans Will Be Disappointed (Shocker)
This one is a no-brainer. A Texans loss is like a bad breakup; it's painful, it's confusing, and you'll probably eat a lot of ice cream. But remember, heartbreak is temporary, and there's always next season (or at least the draft).
Tip: Look for small cues in wording.
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The Rival Fanbase Will Be Annoying
Prepare for a barrage of obnoxious texts, social media posts, and general gloating from your friends who support the Colts, Titans, or Jaguars. It's important to stay calm and collected, even if you want to throw your phone into the nearest body of water.
Tip: Write down what you learned.
The Aftermath
After the initial shock and disbelief wears off, it's time to assess the damage. Did the team make critical mistakes? Was the coaching questionable? Or was it just one of those games where everything went wrong? It's important to analyze the loss without resorting to blaming individual players or coaches. Remember, even the best teams lose.
How to Deal with a Texans Loss
- How to avoid social media: Mute keywords like "Texans," "loss," and your favorite player's name.
- How to support the team: Attend games, buy merchandise, and stay positive.
- How to cope with rival fans: Ignore them, or better yet, troll them back (at your own risk).
- How to look forward to the future: Focus on the draft, free agency, and the potential for improvement.
- How to enjoy life: Remember, football is just a game. There are other things to enjoy in life, like tacos, sleep, and not being a Colts fan.
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