When Will the Storm Hit LA? A Guide to the Inevitable Apocalypse (Probably Not)
So, you’re wondering when the storm is going to hit LA, huh? Well, let’s be honest, it’s LA. The weather here is about as predictable as a Kardashian’s outfit change. One minute it’s sunny and 75, the next it’s raining sideways and the palm trees are doing the limbo. But fear not, dear reader, I’m here to guide you through this weather conundrum.
The Storm is Coming… Or Is It?
The truth is, predicting the exact time a storm will hit LA is like trying to predict the next celebrity breakup – it’s gonna happen, we just don’t know when or who will be involved. But let’s break it down.
- The Classic LA Storm: This is the one that makes everyone panic because it’s been, like, three days since it rained. It usually involves a few drops, maybe a sprinkle or two, and then the sun comes back out to mock you.
- The "Oh Crap" Storm: This is the one where the weatherman actually looks concerned. It's accompanied by ominous clouds, thunder that sounds like a herd of angry elephants, and rain that's more like a waterfall.
- The Santa Ana Wind Event: Not technically a storm, but it's worth mentioning because it can feel like one. Dry, hot winds that can turn into a fire hazard. So, maybe don’t grill your hotdogs during this one.
So, When Will It Actually Rain?
If you’re looking for a specific date and time, I’m sorry to disappoint you. But here’s the lowdown:
- Winter: This is your best bet. It's LA's version of winter, which means it might drizzle a bit.
- Spring: You never know. It could be sunny, rainy, or both in the same day.
- Summer: Ha! Good one.
- Fall: Another decent shot, but don't hold your breath.
How to Prepare for the LA Apocalypse (Just Kidding)
While it’s unlikely LA will be hit by a catastrophic storm anytime soon, it's always good to be prepared. Here are a few tips:
- How to stock up for a LA storm: A good bottle of wine and some Netflix shows should suffice.
- How to survive a mudslide in Beverly Hills: Call a realtor.
- How to build an ark in your Hollywood Hills mansion: Hire a really good architect.
- How to find water in the desert: Just kidding, don't move to the desert.
- How to stay sane during a power outage: Remember that time you had to actually talk to your family? Good times.
So, there you have it. The definitive guide to LA storms. Remember, don't panic, stay hydrated, and always have an umbrella handy. Just in case.