Is Drake Playing Hide-and-Seek with Houston?
Okay, so, let's talk about the elephant in the room (or should I say, the ghost in the concert venue): Drake's mysterious absence from Houston. It's like the man is playing a never-ending game of hide-and-seek, and Houston is the only one who hasn't found him yet.
The Drake Drought
We've been parched, Houston. Parched for that signature Drake drip, those smooth rhymes, and that electrifying energy. Remember when concerts were a thing? Pepper your days with anticipation, your nights with dreams of singing along to "One Dance"? Yeah, us too. But Drake, in his infinite wisdom (or maybe just a really good publicist), has decided to bless every other city on Earth except ours.
Drake: The Houdini of Concert Dates
One minute he's in Toronto, chilling with his OVO crew. The next, he's in Tokyo, making sushi and writing new hits. Houston? Crickets. It's like he's pulled off the ultimate disappearing act, right under our noses.
We've tried everything: pleading, begging, even offering to share our Whataburger. Nothing. Zilch. Nada. It's starting to feel like a personal vendetta.
How to Survive the Drake Drought
While we wait for the day Drake finally graces us with his presence, here are a few tips to help you cope:
- Master the art of patience: This skill will come in handy for more than just Drake concerts.
- Love other artists: There's a whole world of music out there, you know.
- Start a Drake fan club: Plan your own mini-concert, complete with cardboard cutouts and karaoke.
How To Questions
How to keep from losing your mind waiting for Drake?
- Find a new hobby. Maybe try painting, or knitting. Or, you know, just binge-watch every show on Netflix.
How to plan a Drake-themed party?
- Decorate with red and black, play his music, and serve poutine. Lots of poutine.
How to convince Drake to come to Houston?
- Hire a private jet, fly to Toronto, and serenade him with your best "Hotline Bling" impression. Or, you know, just keep waiting.
How to survive a Drake concert?
- Hydrate, wear comfortable shoes, and bring earplugs. You'll thank us later.
How to cope with post-Drake concert blues?
- Relive the magic through social media, and start planning your next concert adventure.
So, Houston, let's keep our fingers crossed and our hopes high. Maybe, just maybe, Drake will finally realize what he's missing and come save us from this musical drought. Until then, we'll just keep dreaming of that night when the lights go down, the crowd goes wild, and Drizzy takes the stage.
Insert dramatic sigh