Who Do the Houston Texans Play Next? A Burning Question for the Ages
So, you're wondering who the Houston Texans are going to pummel, er, play next? Well, buckle up, buttercup, because we're about to dive into the thrilling world of NFL scheduling. Or, as I like to call it, "figuring out which team the Texans will inevitably lose to next."
The Texans: A Tale of Woe and Wonder
Let's be honest, the Texans haven't exactly been setting the league on fire. It's like watching a never-ending episode of "Survivor" where the Texans are the ones constantly getting voted off the island. But hey, every underdog story needs a villain, right? And let's face it, the NFL is full of 'em.
Who's Up Next for the Texans?
As of now, the Houston Texans are gearing up to face the New York Giants in a preseason showdown. Think of it as a warm-up before the real pain begins. But don't worry, Texans fans, there's always next year... or the year after that.
Pro Tip: If you're planning on attending the game, bring a comfy cushion, a good book, and maybe a small pet for emotional support.
How to Survive a Texans Game
If you're a die-hard Texans fan (God bless your soul), here are a few tips to help you survive the upcoming season:
- Lower your expectations: This is key. Expecting a win is like expecting a unicorn to show up at your doorstep with a pizza.
- Find a good distraction: Knitting, Sudoku, or learning a new language can be helpful during those particularly painful moments.
- Embrace the humor: Laughter is the best medicine, especially when your team is losing by 30 points.
FAQ: Texans Football 101
- How to avoid disappointment as a Texans fan: Manage your expectations. Remember, even the greatest teams lose.
- How to dress for a Texans game: Wear your favorite Texans jersey, even if it's from a decade ago. It's a fashion statement, people!
- How to survive a Texans tailgate: Stock up on plenty of beer and snacks. You're going to need it.
- How to impress your friends with Texans trivia: Learn about the team's history. Trust me, it's a goldmine for useless information.
- How to stay positive as a Texans fan: Find a hobby. Seriously.