Who Owns Your Heart? I Mean, the Houston Soccer Team
So, you wanna know who's the big cheese, the top dog, the capo di tutti capi of the Houston soccer scene? Well, buckle up, buttercup, because we're about to dive into a world of ownership, where drama meets dollars and soccer meets spreadsheets.
The Reigning Champ of Soccer Ownership
Let's cut to the chase: Ted Segal is the name you need to remember. He's the guy who holds the golden ticket to the Houston Dynamo FC and the Houston Dash. Think of him as the benevolent dictator of soccer in Houston, but with a penchant for fancy suits and probably a really nice office view.
But wait, there's more! This isn't a one-man show. Segal's got a pretty impressive entourage of co-owners, including the basketball extraordinaire, James Harden. So, next time you're watching a Rockets game and Harden is nailing a three-pointer, just remember, he might be scheming his next soccer move on the side.
A Touch of Star Power
And as if that wasn't enough, the ownership crew recently decided to up the ante by bringing in a soccer legend to the team: Tim Howard. Yes, that Tim Howard. The man who made countless saves, had hands like sticky tape, and probably knows more about goalkeeping than the rest of us combined. So, not only does Houston have a great team, but they've also got a walking, talking soccer encyclopedia on their side.
Is it All Sunshine and Lollipops?
Now, let’s not get carried away. Owning a soccer team isn’t all high-fives and trophy lifts. There are probably countless meetings, spreadsheets that would make your eyes glaze over, and the constant pressure to keep fans happy. But hey, someone’s gotta do it, right? And we're pretty grateful Segal and his crew are up for the challenge.
How To... Soccer Ownership 101
How to become a soccer team owner: Start by winning the lottery, then convince a group of insanely rich friends to join you.How to deal with losing a game: Order pizza, watch reruns of old matches, and hope the pain goes away.How to motivate your players: Offer them unlimited pizza, video game tournaments, and the promise of a really cool team bus.How to handle angry fans: Hire a really good PR team and maybe invest in some noise-canceling headphones.How to celebrate a championship: Go absolutely bonkers, but remember to thank your team, your fans, and your accountant.