Bridge Over Troubled Waters (or Not)
So, you want to know how many people kicked the bucket when that bridge in Baltimore decided to take a swan dive into the river? Well, buckle up, buttercup, because this is a tale as dramatic as a soap opera, but with less crying and more heavy machinery.
 |
| How Many People Died In The Baltimore Bridge |
A Bridge Too Far
Let's rewind a bit. It was a dark and stormy night (okay, not really, but it sounds dramatic). Suddenly, BAM! a ship, probably having a midlife crisis, decides to give the Francis Scott Key Bridge a big, watery hug. Eight poor souls working on the bridge were caught in the crossfire, like extras in a disaster movie.
Six Feet Under the Bridge
Sadly, the final count stands at six brave souls who didn't make it. Can you imagine the chaos? One minute, you're fixing a pothole, and the next, you're taking an unexpected swim with the fishes. Not the kind of career change anyone signs up for.
Tip: Make mental notes as you go.
The Search for Answers
Now, you might be wondering, "Why did this happen?" Well, the short answer is: we're still trying to figure that out. Was it the ship's fault? The bridge's? Or did a particularly mischievous seagull cause it all with a well-placed bird bomb? The world may never know.
But hey, at least we can all agree that bridges and ships should probably keep their distance, right? Like, a really, really long distance.
Reminder: Short breaks can improve focus.
FAQ: Bridge-Related Shenanigans
How to avoid being on a bridge when it collapses?
 |
- Easy, don't be on a bridge. Problem solved.
How to become a bridge inspector?
Tip: Focus on clarity, not speed.
- Develop a deep love for concrete and a strong stomach for heights.
How to build a bridge that won't collapse?
- Hire a really good engineer. And maybe avoid naming it after a national anthem.
How to swim to safety if your bridge collapses?
Tip: Reread slowly for better memory.
- Practice holding your breath, because the water's probably cold.
How to avoid becoming a headline in a disaster news story?
- Stay away from bridges, ships, and generally any situation that involves dramatic entrances or exits.
 |
