Conquering the Denver Train: A Mildly Dramatic Guide for the Public Transportation Newbie
So, you've found yourself in the Mile High City and fancy ditching the four-wheeled drama for a spell on Denver's public transportation system, the Regional Transportation District (RTD for short, because nobody likes a mouthful). Excellent choice, my friend! You're about to embark on a journey filled with...well, trains. But fear not, this guide will have you navigating the RTD like a seasoned pro in no time, with minimal existential dread caused by confusing maps.
 |
| How To Ride The Train In Denver |
Step 1: Gearing Up for Glory (or your daily commute)
First things first, you'll need a ticket. Unlike a gladiator entering the Colosseum (though Denver traffic can feel like a battle arena sometimes), violence is not required to obtain your pass. Head to the brightly colored ticket vending machines (TVMs) at any station. These machines accept cash, credit, and even psychic mind-melding if you're feeling particularly advanced.
Pro Tip: Download the RTD app beforehand. It'll not only sell you tickets but also help you plan your trip, because nobody likes wandering the platform aimlessly muttering, "Wait, is this the A Line or the B Line? Do A Lines even exist?"
Step 2: The Platform is Your Stage, Own It (Safely)
Now that you're armed with your ticket (or magical app purchase), strut confidently onto the platform, ready to take on the day. Just remember, this isn't your high school talent show. Avoid impromptu tap dancing routines or existential monologues – trains tend to frown upon such theatrics.
Safety First: Stay clear of the yellow line – it's not there to test your hopscotch skills. Trains are sneaky silent ninjas and can roll up faster than you can say "light rail."
QuickTip: Use the post as a quick reference later.
Step 3: Boarding the Beast (Without Actually Wresting It)
When your train arrives (it will probably announce itself dramatically with a series of dings and dongs – you can't miss it), the doors will magically whoosh open. Please let people off the train before you hop on. Nobody enjoys a game of human Tetris during rush hour.
Finding a Seat: Once aboard, unleash your inner hawk and scan for a vacant seat. If the train is packed (because Denver is awesome and everyone wants to be here), don't be shy – folding seats are your friend. Just ask politely if someone needs the extra space before you unleash your inner contortionist.
Step 4: The Enchanting Journey (or Your Daily Commute)
Find a comfy spot, pop in your headphones (just one, please, situational awareness is key!), and enjoy the ride! The Denver train system offers a delightful tour of the city, from bustling downtown to charming neighborhoods. You might even spot a rogue squirrel or two attempting to hitch a free ride.
Etiquette Essentials: Keep your voice down (unless you witness a squirrel takeover, then by all means, shout it from the rooftops!), and be mindful of your fellow passengers. Avoid spreading your backpack across three seats like a territorial lion, and try not to hog the armrest with your death grip (unless a rogue squirrel jumps on your lap, then by all means, go for it).
QuickTip: Save your favorite part of this post.
Step 5: Reaching Your Destination (Victory Lap Optional)
As you approach your stop, the dulcet tones of the automated announcer will rudely interrupt your squirrel daydreams (or your actual daydreams) to announce your arrival. Gather your belongings and make your way off the train, but remember: Let everyone off before you try and squeeze out.
Now for the Applause: Once you're safely on the platform, feel free to do a little victory dance (a safe one, mind you) for conquering the Denver train system. You've done it!
FAQ: Train Tamer Edition
How to buy a ticket?
 |
Use the ticket vending machines (TVMs) at the station or buy them through the RTD app.
QuickTip: Slowing down makes content clearer.
How much does a ticket cost?
Fares depend on the number of zones you travel through. Check the RTD website for details.
What if the train is crowded?
Use folding seats if needed, but ask politely before claiming the extra space.
QuickTip: Highlight useful points as you read.
What should I do if I miss my stop?
No worries! Just stay on the train until the next stop and head back in the other direction.
Can I bring my bike on the train?
Yes, but only during certain times and on specific lines. Check the RTD website for details.
Now you're ready to ride the rails like a Denver pro! Just remember,
 |
