The Portland Plague (Probably Not, But Let's Investigate Anyway)
Ah, Portland. City of Roses, Raincoats, and... mysterious illnesses? Fear not, fellow Portlandians, because this intrepid reporter (that's me!) is on the case to crack the code of what's knocking our socks off (and by socks, I mean health).
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| What Sickness Is Going Around Portland |
The Usual Suspects: Coughing it Up
First things first, let's clear the air (pun intended). COVID-19 is still around, folks. So, if that persistent tickle in your throat feels suspiciously familiar, getting tested might be a good shout.
Next up, the classic summer downer: the common cold. It's not glamorous, but it's a contender. Think sniffles, a scratchy throat, and that low-key existential dread that comes with a head full of congestion. Remember, soup and Netflix are your best friends here.
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The Plot Thickens: **️♀️ ** Is it Something More Sinister?
Now, if you're experiencing symptoms that feel a little more Breakfast Club detention than a walk in the park, let's not panic. But a trip to your friendly neighborhood doctor might be a good idea. Here are a few things that have been making the rounds lately (but hopefully not your social circle):
- The Norovirus: Also known as the "winter vomiting bug," this lovely little virus can cause nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea. Think twice before sharing that artisanal kombucha with a stranger, folks.
- Influenza (the Flu): It's not quite flu season yet, but influenza can strike year-round. Keep an eye out for fever, chills, muscle aches, and a cough that just won't quit.
Remember: This isn't an exhaustive list, and if you're truly worried, see a doctor. They're like medical detectives, but with way better bedside manner (usually).
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Stay Healthy, Portland! Here's the Skinny:
- Wash your hands like a champion.
- Avoid close contact with sick people (unless they're your adorable pet who needs cuddles, of course).
- Get enough sleep (those midday donut breaks don't count).
- Disinfect commonly touched surfaces. This means your phone, keyboard, and that spork you keep meaning to throw away.
FAQ: Staying Healthy in PDX (Because Google Can't Answer Everything)
How to avoid getting sick on public transportation? Hold your breath and try not to make eye contact (kidding... mostly). Pack hand sanitizer and avoid touching your face.
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How to know if it's allergies or a cold?
Itchy, watery eyes and a runny nose usually point to allergies. Body aches and a fever are more likely a cold.
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How to survive a cold without turning into a hermit?
Stock up on tea, movies, and fuzzy socks. Hydrate like a houseplant and binge-watch that show you've been meaning to get to.
How to convince my roommate to disinfect the bathroom?
Leave passive-aggressive notes with glitter. Just kidding (maybe). Open communication and a good cleaning schedule are key.
Tip: Read mindfully — avoid distractions.
How to get well soon?
Rest, fluids, and maybe a bowl of that fancy soup you never have time to make.
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