Sarkisian's Stay in Austin: A Tale of Burnt Orange and Patience
So, you wanna know how long Steve Sarkisian has been trying to resurrect the Texas Longhorns? Well, buckle up, 'cause this is gonna be a rollercoaster of emotions, just like a typical Texas football season.
The Great Sarkisian Experiment
Steve Sarkisian, the man, the myth, the offensive guru (or so they say), landed in Austin with a splash in 2021. It was like a Hollywood blockbuster trailer: all hype and promise. The Longhorn faithful were salivating, dreaming of those glory days when Texas ruled the college football kingdom. But as we all know, trailers don't always accurately depict the full movie.
The Long and Winding Road to Redemption
Let's cut to the chase: Sark's been in Austin for three seasons now. Three whole seasons! That's enough time to grow a decent beard, learn a new language, or even write a mediocre novel. But has it been enough time to return Texas to its former glory? Well, that's a question for the ages (or at least until the next coaching change).
Some say he's rebuilding, others say he's rebuilding slowly, and a select few believe he's simply rebuilding the wrong way. But hey, Rome wasn't built in a day, and neither is a championship-caliber football program.
Is There Light at the End of the Tunnel?
The 2023 season brought some glimmers of hope. The Longhorns showed some fight, some talent, and even a little bit of swagger. But it's still too early to pop the champagne corks. We're talking about Texas football here, where expectations are as high as the state's ego.
One thing's for sure: the pressure is on. Sark knows it, the fans know it, and even the squirrels in the nearby oak trees know it. Every game is a referendum on his tenure, every loss a fresh wound for the burnt orange faithful.
So, there you have it. The saga of Steve Sarkisian and the Texas Longhorns continues. Will it end in a fairy tale ending or a heartbreaking tragedy? Only time will tell. Or, you know, the next coaching hire.
How-To Questions for the Impatient Fan
- How to manage expectations: Lower them. Way, way down.
- How to survive a Texas loss: Find a quiet place, pour yourself a stiff drink, and repeat, "It's just one game."
- How to become a Texas football expert: Watch a lot of games, drink a lot of beer, and argue passionately about things you don't really understand.
- How to cope with the constant coaching rumors: Ignore them. Or, better yet, start your own rumor mill.
- How to maintain hope: Remember that feeling you got when you were a kid, believing in Santa Claus? Channel that.