The Great McDonald's Breakfast Heist: A Houstonian's Guide
Disclaimer: This post may contain traces of sarcasm, exaggeration, and an unhealthy obsession with breakfast food.
So, you're in Houston, Texas, and you're craving a McMuffin. More importantly, you're wondering when the golden arches stop serving up breakfast bliss. Well, buckle up, buttercup, because this is about to get complicated.
The Breakfast Conundrum
You'd think getting a simple answer to a simple question would be easy, right? Wrong. McDonald's has decided to play hardball with our breakfast desires. It's like they're trying to create a nation of hangry people.
The Official Stance: According to the golden arches themselves, most Houston McDonald's serve breakfast until 10:30 AM or 11:00 AM. But let's be real, this is McDonald's we're talking about. Rules are made to be broken, or at least bent like a soggy McFlurry cone.
The Breakfast Black Market
Some Houston locations are rumored to have extended breakfast hours, like a secret breakfast society. These are the legends, the unicorns of the fast-food world. People whisper about them in hushed tones, their eyes filled with longing and regret for missed opportunities.
How to Win the Breakfast Battle
If you're determined to get your breakfast fix, here are a few tips:
- Be early: Like, really early. The earlier you get there, the better your chances of snagging that coveted Egg McMuffin.
- Check the app: Some McDonald's apps allow you to check the menu for specific locations. It's like having a secret agent in your pocket.
- Embrace the all-day breakfast: While it's not the same, some McDonald's offer all-day breakfast options. It's like settling for a warm hug instead of a passionate kiss.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
How to guarantee I get McDonald's breakfast?
- Sleep at the drive-thru.
How to deal with sold-out breakfast items?
- Start a support group or riot. Your choice.
How to convince McDonald's to serve breakfast 24/7?
- Write a heartfelt letter, or stage a peaceful protest with signs that say "We All Deserve Egg McMuffins."
How to survive the post-breakfast blues?
- Treat yourself to a Happy Meal. The toys will distract you.
How to become a breakfast connoisseur?
- Eat breakfast at every McDonald's in Houston and rank them. You're welcome.