Who Do Houston Texans Play

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Who Do the Houston Texans Play? A Deep Dive into Football Foolishness

So, you're wondering who the Houston Texans are going to beat up, er, I mean, play this season? Well, buckle up, football fan, because we're about to embark on a thrilling journey through the Texans' schedule.

The Texans: Underdogs or Upstarts?

Let's be honest, the Texans haven't exactly been setting the NFL world on fire lately. They're more like a smoldering campfire than a blazing inferno. But hey, every underdog has its day, right? Maybe this is their year. Maybe they'll surprise everyone and start throwing touchdowns like confetti at a New Year's Eve party.

The Schedule: A Mix of Monsters and Munchkins

The Texans have a schedule that's about as balanced as a toddler on a pogo stick. They've got some games against teams that look like they could bench press a small car (we're looking at you, Kansas City Chiefs), and then there are those matchups where you're thinking, "Houston, we have a problem (of winning)." But hey, that's football. It's supposed to be exciting, right?

How to Watch the Texans: A Survival Guide

If you're brave enough to watch the Texans this season, here are a few tips:

  • Lower your expectations: This is crucial. Expecting a Super Bowl run is like expecting a squirrel to fly a plane.
  • Stock up on snacks: You're going to need something to munch on during those long, painful drives.
  • Find a good therapist: Just kidding (kind of).

FAQ: Houston Texans Edition

How to survive a Texans game? Pace yourself, hydrate, and have a sense of humor.How to become a Texans fan? Question your life choices and consult a therapist.How to predict the Texans' record? Flip a coin and consult a psychic.How to stay sane during the Texans' season? Avoid social media, especially Texans fan pages.How to enjoy watching the Texans? Lower your expectations (again).

So there you have it, a comprehensive guide to the Houston Texans. Will they shock the world? Will they break our hearts? Only time will tell. But one thing's for sure: it's going to be a wild ride.

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