Who’s Calling the Plays Now? Meet the Texans’ New Coach
So, the Houston Texans decided to shake things up and get themselves a new coach. Shocker, right? Like, it’s not like they’ve been through a revolving door of coaches or anything. But hey, third time’s a charm, right? Or is it sixth? Who’s counting?
DeMeco Ryans: The Man, the Myth, the Legend (Maybe)
Meet DeMeco Ryans, the fresh face (well, not that fresh) on the Texans’ sideline. He’s got a Super Bowl ring, which is more than most of us can say. But can he translate his playing prowess into coaching genius? Only time will tell.
Some folks are calling him the next great coach. Others are just hoping he can get the team to win more than four games in a season. We’re somewhere in the middle. It’s like when you order a pizza and hope it's not terrible, but you’re not exactly expecting a gourmet masterpiece either.
Can He Turn Things Around?
The Texans have been a bit of a dumpster fire lately. Like, a dumpster fire that’s also on fire. So, can Ryans come in and work his magic? Will he be able to turn this team into a contender? Or will he just be another name on the long list of failed Texans coaches?
Only time will tell. But hey, at least it's entertaining to watch. Kind of like a train wreck, but with football.
How to...
- How to become a Texans fan: Easy, just have a high tolerance for disappointment.
- How to impress a Texans fan: Mention how much you love the team’s color scheme. Or, you know, just don’t bring up football.
- How to survive a Texans game: Bring plenty of snacks and drinks. And maybe some earplugs.
- How to cope with being a Texans fan: Therapy. Lots and lots of therapy.
- How to tell if the Texans are actually going to win: When pigs fly.
