Who Were the Houston Texans' Quarterbacks? A Tale of Woe and Wonder
Let's talk about the Houston Texans quarterbacks. A topic so thrilling it's like watching paint dry, but with more interceptions.
The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
The Texans, bless their cotton socks, have had a quarterback carousel that would make a carnival owner jealous. We’ve seen the highs, the lows, and everything in between. From guys who could throw a football a mile to those who couldn’t hit a wide-open receiver if their life depended on it.
- Deshaun Watson: Ah, the golden boy. Before the off-field stuff, he was a magician with the ball. Quick feet, strong arm, and a knack for making something out of nothing. But let's not dwell on the past, shall we?
- Matt Schaub: Once upon a time, Schaub was the man. But then came the fumbles, the interceptions, and the infamous playoff meltdown. A classic tale of a promising career gone awry.
- David Carr: The first overall pick, Carr was supposed to be the savior. Unfortunately, he was sacked more times than a piñata at a toddler's birthday party. The offensive line? More like a sieve.
And then there’s a whole cast of characters like Ryan Fitzpatrick, Brian Hoyer, Brock Osweiler (who?), and Case Keenum. It’s like the Texans were playing a real-life version of Madden, experimenting with different quarterbacks every season.
The Eternal Search for a Franchise Quarterback
The Texans have been on a relentless quest for a franchise quarterback. It's like searching for a needle in a haystack, but with way less hay and a lot more disappointment. Will they ever find their Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Only time will tell.
Until then, we can only sit back, grab some popcorn, and enjoy the rollercoaster ride that is Houston Texans quarterback play.
How To...
- How to become a Texans fan: Love pain and disappointment? You're in the right place!
- How to survive a Texans game: Stock up on alcohol and pain relievers.
- How to avoid talking about Texans quarterbacks: Change the subject to the weather.
- How to impress your friends with Texans trivia: Mention David Carr's sack record.
- How to find hope in the Texans’ future: Don’t.
