Why Are They Called the Houston Texans? A Deep Dive into Mediocrity
So, you're wondering why a football team in Texas is called the Texans. Well, buckle up, buttercup, because this is about as exciting as watching paint dry.
A Name as Original as Vanilla Ice Cream
Let's get one thing straight: naming a team "Texans" is about as creative as calling a pizza place "Pizza." It's like, duh, they're from Texas, hence the name. But hey, at least they didn't go with the "Houston Oilers" again. Can you imagine the awkwardness of that?
A Brief History Lesson (Because Who Doesn't Love Those?)
The Houston Texans were born in the year 2002, which, if you're doing the math, is a mere blink of an eye in NFL history. Unlike some teams with storied pasts and legendary players, the Texans have mostly been a tale of near-misses and heartbreaking losses. But hey, every underdog story needs a villain, right?
The Name Controversy: A Non-Existent One
You might be thinking, "Wait, there was a controversy?" Nope, not really. The name was chosen through a focus group, and apparently, "Texans" beat out such inspiring options as "Apollos" and "Bobcats." So, thank the focus group for saving us from a team called the Houston Bobcats.
So, Why Not Something Cooler?
You know what would have been cool? The Houston Armadillos. Or maybe the Houston Oil Derricks. Anything would have been better than just slapping "Texans" on the side of a helmet. But hey, maybe they were going for a strong, no-nonsense image. Kind of like a brick wall.
How to...
- How to become a Texans fan: Easy, just enjoy the rollercoaster of emotions that comes with being a fan of a team that's always "on the brink" of greatness.
- How to survive a Texans game: Bring a good book, a comfy blanket, and maybe some snacks. You'll need them.
- How to explain to your friends why you're a Texans fan: Honesty is the best policy. Tell them you like a challenge.
- How to cope with another Texans loss: Ice cream, chocolate, and maybe a little therapy.
- How to hope for a better season next year: Practice deep breathing and meditation.